The Untamable Tongue | The Realistic Optimist


The Untamable Tongue

11:03 AM


Gossip—this is one habit that seems to be deeply ingrained in our culture and daily life. In our community, I often see my neighbors huddling among themselves and buzzing even as their day is only starting. This often results to conflicts and strained relationships.
Based on my observation, these are some of the reasons why people tend to gossip:
  • They’re not happy seeing someone doing well in life, so they resort to gossiping just to pull the person down.
  • Gossipers, I noticed, are people with a lot of insecurities. To feel better about themselves, they resort to talking about others, thinking that it can give them emotional security and boost their self-esteem.
  • Ruining the relationship of other people is a source of gratification for gossipers, perhaps because they are not happy with their families and partners.
  • They have a habit of getting the sympathy and favor of others through talking ill about someone who they don’t get along with.
  • Sometimes, people gossip because they don’t have anything better to do, so they just resort to chattering away just to pass the time.
  • Meanwhile, others tolerate and join in because they want to belong in that group.
  • They want to get attention.


Because of gossiping, many get into trouble, relationships are broken, and lives lose their purpose. Think about it, is gossip something that you want to include in your routine? If you want to block it out of your life and avoid engaging in such discussions, here’s what you need to know:
  • If you constantly engage in gossip, you will lose sight of the more important aspects of your life and more pressing issues that need your attention.
  • Gossip will, in no way, help you achieve your goals in life. Yes, there may be times that you can use slandering to manipulate situations in order to get what you want, but remember that it can have grave consequences in the long run.
  • If you constantly gossip, others may think that you cannot be trusted and that you don’t have credibility. If you want to have true and fulfilling relationships with others, you need to build trust, and you can’t do that if you keep on bad-mouthing people behind their backs.

Based from my experience and what I saw first-hand, spreading rumors only does harm and never results into something good. I grew up in a neighborhood where gossiping seems to be the norm, and I choose not to participate in this non-sense chitchat. It’s fine if I don’t gain their favor because I choose to avoid unhealthy conversations with them, because at the end of the day, what matters is that I live my life peacefully without causing harm to others.



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2 Comments

  1. This is really an enlightening post. Thank you for sharing Aris. How do I automatically receive new posts from this blog in my inbox?

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    1. Hi Sarah. Thank you for dropping by. Just enter your email address in the form provided at the upper right corner of the page. :-)

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